Analysis of Desensitized

As promised, this post is on the parallels between Desensitized and today’s world.

Self-harm: I know that there are many people who suffer with self-confidence, stress, family problems, and the like. Ashland represents those people. She takes pills to be “normal.” Think anti-depressants, mood stabilizers, ibuprofen, etc. She cuts to relieve the emotions she can’t talk to anyone about. She smokes, and she’s lonely, but covers it up with a smile, just like so many of us do.

I’m still working on it, but my hope is that people will be able to relate to her and, through her struggles, identify their problems and overcome them. Or at least give them the incentive or hope they need to begin to crawl toward the light.

Cliques and government corruption: The next thing is the Outcasts vs. Elites. In schools, work places, and pretty much every place you go, you’ll notice there’s the “cool” kids and the “weirdos” with whom no one wants to hang out. There are always cliques. This is taken to an extreme where whole societies play this game of who’s cool and who’s not.

The Elites appear to be the clean, well-mannered, white sheep in the world. They live in nice homes, have an organized government, etc.; however, they are corrupt on the inside and very racist. Basically, they’re everything they call the Outcasts out on.

The Outcasts, on the other hand, are poor people struggling to survive. They can’t help the situation they’re in and so they become calloused just to stay alive without hurting too bad. On the inside, while they appear to be tough, they’re just broken people who really have no idea how to achieve a higher quality of life.

The right to life: As many of you know, there are issues like abortion and euthanasia out there. While they claim to support people’s “rights to choose,” they’re just organizations built on lies.

Ever read the book “Animal Farm” by George Orwell? In that book, the society begins as “all animals are equal.” Throughout, the animals with the most power begin to slowly make exceptions and, by the end of the book, the above slogan transforms into, “all animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others.”

This is one of the issues dealt with in Desensitized. I portray abortion and euthanasia as it is: murder. Real doctors save lives, they don’t end them. No one should be allowed to play God and decide who gets to live and who doesn’t. That’s sick and stupid. However, in this second draft, I’m going to try to let the reader know that no matter what, they’re redeemable. No matter what anyone’s done, if they are truly sorry, they will be forgiven.

Don’t judge. You never know what someone’s going through. This is one of the larger issues in Desensitized. The Outcast Cael looks dark, has tattoos, seems like a heartless jerk, but he’s really just a sad boy who wants to love and be loved though he’d never tell anyone that. 😉 Kody, Cael’s twin, is a fun guy who drinks, smokes, and parties all the time. He’s just trying to forget all of his pain. No one is ever the way they seem to be. Everyone has some struggle they’re going through and they just might not know how to get it out.

Faith: Ashland prays and learns to trust God. It’s not a central theme, but more of a side theme. I like to keep my novels so they reflect my faith, but also so that others won’t find it too preachy. If you don’t agree, okay. That’s fine. I’m not going to shove it down your throat, but I do have the right to freedom of speech and I’m going to act on it, regardless of whether people agree with me or not. 😉

Just a note, I will be rehashing the plot line. I’m just not sure what I’m going to do with it, yet, so we’ll see how this works. 😛

God bless!

Desensitized + Snippets

Well, I hate being without a writing project for even short periods of time.

So, I’ve taken to rewriting Desensitized. After the first book is done, I might rewrite the other two or edit The Reset, depending on what I want to do. 🙂

quoteThe next post will be a more in-depth analysis, so to speak, on the meaning of Desensitized.

If you haven’t taken a look at the overview of Desensitized, I’ll just give you a little blurb written by the hilarious and lovely Una:

“It’s not a particularly cheerful story at times.  It’s quite dark and depressing, although there’s always hope.  I’m not sure how it’ll be in this draft, but in the first draft there was some graphic imagery involving abortion victims and euthanasia.  Also, the main character – Ashland – has a self-harm problem when the story begins, although by the ending she no longer has that problem.”

As you can see, this isn’t a novel for the faint of heart. I’ve decided to write on real-life issues and tell it how it is. There aren’t many gruesome scenes, though. 😉 Some of my inspiration came from the actions of a man known as Kermit Gosnell. He committed horrendous crimes against life that even hardhearted politicians found to be disgusting.

He would sever the spines of babies, cut their limbs and place them in jars in the fridge where food would go. He would kill babies even after they had been born prematurely using different methods, including twisting their heads off.

I read this stuff and I get sick. How can people be so calloused? This is going on in today’s world and no one says anything. We turn a blind eye and let it go on.

I hope that by being sickeningly honest, my novels will open the eyes of my readers to these horrors.

Not trying to shove opinions down people’s throats, here! Just uncovering the facts. 😉 I like to let my readers decide whether or not they’ll believe in what I’m writing. If, by the end of one of my novels, the reader hasn’t at least been challenged to think about their perspective, then I will consider myself a failure.

Ain’t that pleasant?

Also, Ashland is a self-harmer. I needed her to be in order to try and help those who struggle with this as well. I want them to know they’re not alone and that there’s always a way out. I love them so very much and, while I may not be able to be there for them, I want them to know it’s all going to be okay. And I mean it. Some of my friends have gone through this struggle, and one of them quit, thank goodness. I realize, because of her, the importance of having a friend or someone to talk to when you’re struggling, so this is what I’m doing to try to help. ❤

And now: snippet time.

Corinth smirks. “Well, it’s better that I be a stalker and you be alive than me just head home and you die in the street, hm?”

“It’s debatable,” I counter, pulling my bag from his hands. He refuses to let go and jerks it – and me – closer.

“I want to hear a thank you,” he says, grinning.

“Thanks, sweetheart. I need to get my phone back and go home. I’ve got lots of studying to do.”

Corinth spreads his hands out. “I’m hurt! I just saved your life and you’re not going to buy me dinner or anything!”

“I’ll buy you three bullets,” I offer. “Dinner is something I tend to enjoy alone.”



“Is that supposed to be insulting?” Corinth raises an eyebrow.


“Did you see all the love?” I ask him with raised eyebrows. “It’s disgusting! I felt like I was intruding. Besides, everything’s cool. They got their kid back and I’ve got my homework. Everything’s just hunky dory.”


“Where are we?” I ask, attempting to sit up again.

“I said don’t move,” the older young man snaps.

“Why not?” I fire back.

“Because I said so.”

I roll my eyes. “Wow, you should be a lawyer. Where are we?” I repeat.

One black eyebrow rises. “In a cave.”

“What? You’re, like, a genius or a detective!” I gasp. “I never would have guessed!”


“Well, I’m Anna – Cael and Cole’s mom.” She jerks a finger over her shoulder to indicate the boys behind her. “Around here, we don’t complain, we eat what’s put in front of us, and we support each other. If you can’t handle that, you can go back home.”

I nod. “I can do it.”

She chuckles. “We’ll see. Now rest up. You never know when it’ll be time to get moving again.”


“Do you know what the chain of command is?” I open my mouth to respond, but he holds up a finger to silence me. I suppose it’s rhetorical. “It’s the chain I beat you with until you understand who, exactly, is in command here. Do I need to get it out? No? All right then. Get rid of those and go to sleep.”

I mentally shout abuse at him because I would never put my life out on the line by verbalizing my thoughts.


“You’ve got to be heartless!” I cry, appalled at his whole attitude. I just came over to console him, but now I don’t know why. He doesn’t want help.

Cael places his hand on my chin in an iron-strong grip. “I’m not heartless,” he growls. “I just learned to use my heart less.”

“Or not at all,” I mutter under my breath as I turn and walk away.

God bless!


Something New

Good evening, ladies and gentlemen! 🙂

So, Inkpen Authoress has started a thing. It’s called chatterbox. Every month, there’s a new “prompt” if I may use the term. In essence, you’ve got to take the word/sentence she’s put up there and write about it using your characters. Did that make sense? Like, if it’s about coffee, you write about the characters drinking/serving/talking over coffee. If that still doesn’t make sense, check out her blog and hopefully that’ll work. 😛

Anyway, I’ll be doing that. This month’s chatterbox topic? Have you guessed? Coffee. 😉

Here’s my snippet using my babies Cael and Aspen and Kody (Cael’s twin brother) and Core and Blade from Desensitized. This is from the second book in the series. It’s written from Aspen’s point of view.

“What do we do between now and then?”

“Take advantage of this time and catch up on sleep.”

“Sounds good.”

“Not you.” Cael pokes my arm. “You are spending time with Kody. And you’re going to be the best of friends.”

He smiles wickedly. “And while you’re working things out, I’m going to catch up on sleep. Now… if you don’t mind…?” Cael makes a shooing motion with his hand, indicating that I should move so he can get out. I cross my arms.

“You’re staying here just in case this doofus decides to break someone’s face again,” I say, nodding in Kody’s direction. “Blade and Core can go to sleep first.”

The two boys perk up at the thought, then slide out of the booth and head upstairs before Cael can stop them. He glares at me.

“Just until you start getting along,” he says, rubbing his eyes.

“You’ll be needing some coffee then,” I say.

“Already had some.”

“You need more. Do they do free refills?”

“I think so. Kody would you mind…?”

The older twin grudgingly complies, scraping three mugs off the table and bringing them to the counter.


I’d love to see your snippets if you decide to choose to join in the chatterbox prompt! If you want to share, go ahead and leave a link to your blog/website (or leave the snippet if you don’t have a blog/website which is totally fine!) and I’ll check it out! 😀 I can’t leave comments, depending on who you are, but I will check it out. 🙂


God bless!