Welcome to Monday. *groans, yawns, and coffee-slurps are heard in the distance*
A lesson that I’ve learned recently is that you need to be true to yourself. When I attended regular school (before I began homeschooling), I always tried to fit in and it was hell. Now, seven years later, I’m still working on being comfortable in my own skin. Even with good friends, I have a hard time telling them that I’m really not obsessed with that t.v. show. Stupid, right? But it makes a big difference.
If you can’t stand up and differ on little opinions, how are you going to do it with the big ones? I’ve tried to just go with a few things I was uncomfortable with because they didn’t make much of a difference or I didn’t know how to speak up. And it bothered me. Now, I’m still working
on being able to tell someone I disagree or think they’re wrong.
And, you know, that’s easier to do that when you don’t know someone too well. I have no problem making someone frustrated because of my opinions. I enjoy it actually. #guiltypleasures But when it comes to someone I care about, I find it hard to say anything because I don’t want them to get hurt.
But you know what? That’s wrong of me. Of course, some little issues don’t matter and not everything should become grounds for debate because that’s annoying and people will shun you and you will have to live in a cave as a hermit for the rest of your life feeding off the bugs that dare to cross your turf. Just kidding. Sort of.
What was wrong of me was the fact that I didn’t have the guts the stand up to someone I cared about and tell them I thought they were wrong. It’s easier to disagree on the big things, right? The controversial issues that are commonly debated. But when it comes to the actions of someone you love, you don’t want to hurt them, but you actually end up doing just that. The longer you wait to tell someone they’re doing something you think is wrong, the more they think you’re cool with it. When you finally get the guts to say something, you’ve basically shattered that false conception they had of you regarding that issue and trust is lost and it’s not pretty. Everyone gets hurt.
The habits I created in Elementary school still cling to me today and it’s really hard to break them. So just be careful what lines you blur and what compromises you make. They do impact your life, as well as others, in the long run.
Also, make sure that you’re not blaming yourself as you learn a lesson. You’re learning. You’re expanding your horizons and that’s okay. Sometimes, learning comes at a huge cost. Life is full of mistakes. Make good ones, okay? And, most importantly, learn from them.
The Getting-Over-It Process:
1) Identify your mistake and look at it objectively (take a step back, breathe, and look at exactly what happened).
2) Accept that you made it (if you did).
3) If you can, get someone else’s perspective on it.
4) Try to fix it.
5) Forgive yourself.